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Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Week in Review

I debated on whether or not to write this post, but I decided to go ahead and do it. Forrest Gump was right. Life IS like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get . . .

Last weekend I had to make a trip to Georgia. Seth and the children stayed in Louisiana so it was just me, myself and I. On the way back, I decided to listen to my Bible on CD so I had already settled in for a long drive. As I crossed the state line into Alabama, I noticed Bama's finest EVERYWHERE. They were lined up on the side of the road and in the median as well. I wasn't worried. I was wearing my seat belt, and I was riding on cruise control. So as I was going down a hill and headed up another, I noticed that one of the patrol cars had pulled out behind me. I thought it was odd. I mean, weren't they supposed to be pulling people over? Why would one all of a sudden just decide to take a drive? After another mile or so, I see blue lights flashing in my rear view mirror. And then I realize he's pulling me over! There's a first time for everything, and that's the very first time in my entire life that I've been stopped by a policeman and a state patrol at that! After all, I'm a rules person and pretty much tend to see everything as black or white.

So as I'm pulling over I'm trying to decide why in the world he's pulling me over. I knew for a fact I was not speeding. And I was definitely wearing my seat belt. But I was also talking on my cell phone. Kayla had called because she was at the grocery store, and she wanted to be sure she hadn't missed anything on my list of supplies for Connor. So I thought that maybe Alabama had one of those no-talking-on-your-cell-while-driving laws. That was the only thing I could think of.

So I come to a stop, and my new friend approaches the passenger side window. I can tell by the look on his face that he's a bit stunned when he looks inside my vehicle. I'm not sure what he was expecting, but I guess it was a bit unexpected . . . the second row (I drive a Tahoe) seats were folded down, and I had removed the third row seats and put them on top of the second row. I had two wing-back chairs from my Grandmother's house that I was hauling back with me, and they were stuffed in the back. And not to mention that I'm listening to the Gospel of Matthew chapter 6 at this point! So then he looks at me and tells me he pulled me over because he thinks the tint on my windows is too dark! Seriously?!? You have got to be kidding me!

At this point, I'm pretty aggravated because I think it's just ridiculous. So he asks for my license and insurance. I explain to him that my insurance card is in the glove box and that I'm going to have to reach over, move my suitcase (that was stuffed in the front seat) and open the glove box. After all, I didn't want him to think I was going after a concealed weapon or anything! So he takes my license and leaves me to retrieve the insurance card. He comes back and decides to make small talk . . . he wants to know if I'm headed back home and if I live anywhere near Broussard, LA, because he "doesn't know much about Louisiana." At this point, my answers are simply yes and no. And then he tells me that he has some sort of machine thingy that he's going to put against my window to test the tint. So he does that, and just as quickly, I notice his countenance falls. He looks at me and says, "Well, you're fine and so is your tint. You aren't getting a ticket. I can't even give you warning." He was so disappointed. So I tell him, "Thank you very much," and I roll my window up and just start laughing. I mean . . . REALLY?!? I guess he didn't have anything else better to do.

So I get home really late that night. The kids are in bed. And I get "the look" from my husband when he sees what's in the back of my Tahoe. And then he gets "the look" from me when I shine my lights out into our yard. I'd already been forewarned about this . . .

We built our house last year. Once it was finished, we were so tired that we decided to wait awhile before tackling the landscaping and the yard in general. So that's this spring/summer's project. We built on land that used to be a pasture so the ground was very uneven, and there were lots of holes everywhere. And there was more weeds than grass. You really couldn't tell, but it was a very bumpy ride when mowing the weeds/grass. So Seth decided that the whole yard needed to be chopped and leveled. If you're like me, you aren't sure what "chopped" is, but basically it's like tilling up the whole entire yard (I know it as "harrow"). And then you drag the dirt around to fill in the holes and low spots and smooth it out (I'll take a picture in the morning and post it so you can see what I'm talking about). After that, you're ready to lay sod or plant seed. We'll be doing the latter! I don't dispute the fact that this really needed to be done and was the right way to do it. But I just didn't want to think too much about it because a yard of nothing but dirt and a 5-year-old and a 3-year-old just don't go together.

So while I was gone . . . the yard was chopped. It's nothing but dirt. Everywhere. That has made playing outside just a little complicated and frustrating for the kids and for me. But we've managed. I'm very . . . let's just use the word PARTICULAR . . . about my house and my floors . . . meaning that I sweep and mop multiple times a week . . . so you can imagine my nightmare. Anyway. We've made the best of it. I pretty much require Mason and Hannah Kate to wear their rubber boots that way they can play all they want, even in the dirt, and then just drop their boots at the door without tracking in too much of a mess. So keep that in mind. The same night I get home, Seth also tells me that we can't flush the toilet in our bathroom while the water is on in the shower. I heard him say that, but I rather quickly dismissed it. I wasn't having a problem with it. And then the next day, he goes to Texas for the remainder of the week.

This morning I noticed the toilet didn't flush when I woke up. It was stopping up. So I asked Mason to use the toilet in the mudroom. I wasn't worried. I figured it would eventually drain out. And then I forgot about it. After lunch I was going to clean the bathrooms. I noticed the toilet was still stopped up. I ignored it. As I was cleaning the sinks, I heard a gurgling sound and thought the water was probably going back down. I was wrong. It was coming up and out! So I sort of kept ignoring it because I didn't know what to do or what was going on (I later realize this happened when my washing machine was draining). And then Hannah Kate came in and said she had to go potty so I asked her to use the toilet in the mudroom instead. She comes back and tells me that toilet is stopped up, too! And then I notice water standing in the bottom of the tub, and I hadn't run any water in the tub. So at this point, I know we have a problem. A BIG problem. Did I mention that Seth is some 300 miles away?!? He always misses out on the fun. So I have to call my father-in-law. He's not home so we have to wait a few hours.

When Mason got off the bus, the first thing I did was explain to him that he could not use any of the toilets and to tell me when he needs to potty. Right after we come inside, he tells me he needs to go. So I told him to go outside and put his boots on. When he asks me why, I explain that we're going to have to walk to the woods to potty. He quickly changes his mind and decides he doesn't have to go that bad. Five minutes later, he comes back and says, "Mama, I really have to poop really bad." So I told him to go outside and put his boots on. I grab a tub of wipes, and we start walking to the woods. At this point, I'm watching my 5-year-old walk across our backyard, which is nothing but dirt, wearing his rubber boots . . . so he can go potty in the woods . . . !!! I mean . . . is this Little House on the Prairie or what?!?

And I'll not even tell you what happened when Hannah Kate finally had to go potty. I had to teach her how to "squat," and she was absolutely MORTIFIED.

Long story short . . . my father-in-law came to our rescue. He had to dig up the pipe and cut a section out of it to let everything drain out to the ditch beside the house. It was stopped up . . . and I'll not say what the culprit is because it was rather embarrassing . . . but it's un-stopped now so we have to wait on everything to dry out a bit before we can completely fix the pipe and then move the yucky dirt away that absorbed all of the drainage.And it's just Thursday . . .

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