Today was Mason's first day of 3rd grade. He woke up with a smile. When I dropped him off in the car pool line, he was still smiling. And he greeted me with a smile again this afternoon when I picked him up. It was a great day!
We missed Mason today. I passed the hours by cleaning windows, cleaning fan blades and replacing light bulbs. That's just a typical first-day-of-school for me.
Hannah Kate begins kindergarten this year, but her first day isn't until August 19. She was quite disappointed when she found out she has to wait another ten days before starting school. Tomorrow she will go to school for her "kindergarten test." Next Thursday evening we have kindergarten orientation. And then the first day of school. She is so ready. She's talked about how she wants me to pack her lunchbox. She can't wait to wear her new uniform and tennis shoes. Today she finished the workbooks we've been doing this summer. She kept asking me, "Okay Mom. I'm done. What next?"
When we went to pick up Mason this afternoon, she just stared out the window at the kids on the playground. She was the cutest little thing. She was wearing one of Abbie's hand-me-down outfits and her cowboy hat and gloves from two recitals ago. She was quite the sight.
During the past several months I've also thought and prayed a lot, asking the Lord to use me and to use our story to somehow help other children and families. I don't know right now what that means. When I was working on my Master's in Education at Southeastern, I was required to pursue dual certification in regular education and special education. At the time, I had no intention nor interest in teaching special education. But that has changed. At the same time, I've become quite attached to our Social Worker and therapists at McMain's. The work they do is amazing. They were instrumental in helping Mason to believe in himself again. Speech therapy and occupational therapy . . . it's absolutely fascinating! But I have to be honest. During the past couple of months, I've really wanted to go to Law School. I would love to be a child advocacy lawyer or somehow work at the state level to advocate for children with disabilities in the school system. Of course, right now I have my hands full with just our school!
I don't know what 3rd grade holds. But I am convinced that we will be just fine. There will be some hard days. I know that. But the Lord goes before us and has prepared the way for us. None of this has taken Him by surprise! He knew all along. The Psalmist's words have meant so much more to me:
"O LORD, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word on my tongue, but behold, O LORD, you know it altogether. You have hedged me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me.
For You formed [Mason's] inward parts;
You covered [Mason] in my womb.
I will praise You, for [Mason] is fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
and that my soul knows very well.
[Mason's] frame was not hidden from You, when he was made in secret,
and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Your eyes saw [Mason's] substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
the days fashioned for [Mason]
when as yet there were none of them."
~Psalm 139