On the way home from grocery shopping yesterday, the kids decided they wanted sandwiches for lunch. My people are not sandwich people. They totally get that from Seth. I'm quite certain the three of them have NEVER all asked for a sandwich for lunch on the same day. Mason prefers all the junk like crackers and chips and corndogs. Hannah Kate requires a protein, starch and veggie at every single meal, breakfast included. I mean, it's a sad day at the Bayham's if Hannah Kate has to eat a sandwich. And Ellie eats only what she absolutely has to in order to get a "snack," which means she goes without a snack a lot of days. So why the change of heart all of a sudden? Of course, there was a catch. There's always a catch. They wanted to make their sandwiches all by themselves. All three of them. And you know what? That was music to my ears. So while I put away the groceries, the kids got everything they needed, made their lunches, put everything back up, grabbed something to drink and sat down at the table to eat. And this is the conversation that commenced during the making of the sandwiches.
Hannah Kate grabbed a butter knife to put mayo on her bread. Mason doesn't eat any condiments of any kind, including mayo.Mason: Hannah Kate, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to be using that knife.
Hannah Kate: Whatever, Mason. I used a knife last night all by myself when I made my sandwich.
(I mean, the fact that she ate a sandwich two days in a row . . . she must be feeling a bit under the weather.)
Mason: Yeah, Hannah Kate, that's because DAD was here and not MOM. You know it's "safety first" with Mom. Like that day she and Ellie came home from dance, and we had the four wheeler on the trampoline. Dad was here, and he didn't say anything to us about it, but Mom couldn't get the truck parked fast enough before she came running into the back yard yelling at us to get it off. You know with Mom it's all about safety.
I mean, I can't even.
First of all, I have NEVER said, "Safety first," and that is certainly NOT my motto. I mean, don't get me wrong. It would be a good one, of course.
Second of all, the four wheeler incident is a true story, and Mason is exactly right about that one. But it was Ellie's Power Wheels four wheeler and not the "real" one.
Third of all, what am I? I'm obviously not the fun parent. I guess I'm just the necessary one.
Fourth of all, nobody ate a sandwich for lunch today. It was back to lunch as usual around here.